We All Cry Sometimes
by CDNGoddess
Summary: Abby and Ray are always at each others throats. Is it because they genuinely don't like each other? Or is it something more? Sorry, bad summary. Chapter 5 (fixed)and 6 now up. Please continue R&R! And for those of you who already have, thanks for the
1. Default Chapter

**Disclaimer: **I do not own ER, I do not own the characters, basically, I own nothing, so please do not sue! Much obliged!

**Note: **I have not posted here in a really, really long time, so yes, reviews are very welcome. I am a little rusty as well, so constructive criticism is also welcome. Oh yeah, and there seems to be more chapters that I originally intended to post at one time, but it was because I was inspired and it took too long to register. So yes, I apologize for the longness of it.

**Synopsis: **Abby and Ray are always at each other's throats. Is it because they genuinely dislike each other or is it something more? Can Abby break down the wall that she has put up and let someone in?

**Rating: **PG-13

**Warning: **Some objectionable words and phrases.

**We all Cry Sometimes**

_Chapter 1-_

Outside, the snow was gently the falling, the air was crisp, and the lights below made the snow sparkle before it touched the ground. Abby Lockhart sighed; it had been a long day at County Hospital. She had witnessed the death of a little boy, no more than the age of 12. He had been playing ice hockey outside with some friends when a drunk driver skidded on some ice and hit the boy, driving away soon after. A hit and run. None of the other children had gotten the license plate, which frustrated Abby. She knew that they were only children, but there had been no one else around to identify the car. She knew that the driver would eventually be caught, but it broke her heart to know that another parent had lost a child and that another child had lost his life because of a stupid accident. These were the cases that took their toll on her.

"Are you OK Abby?" Neela, Abby's roommate and colleague asked her.

"Hmm? Oh yeah, I'm fine." She answered, suddenly awoken from her daydream.

Neela frowned, "Are you sure you don't want me to stay? I know you've had a hard day, and if you need to talk to someone…"

"No it's OK, I'll be fine, you go. Have fun. I think I'm just going to go for a walk, or a run, or something. Get some fresh air. I don't want you to be late for dinner with your family." Abby forced a smile.

"Trust me, there are many things I would much rather be doing than having dinner with my parents. I really don't mind staying if you need me. I can keep you company," Neela frowned, concerned for her friend.

Abby walked towards the door and held it open, "Really. I'm fine." Neela frowned, put on her coat and walked to the door, looking concerned for her friend, "Go." Abby urged. Neela sighed and finally left. Abby closed the door behind her, and leaned against it, closing her eyes. She hated herself for showing her emotions. It was just days like these that made her question her career choice, but then she remembered all of those she was able to save today, and while the memory of the little boy was still fresh, she attempted to push it to the back of her mind. She decided that she would go for a run to try to take her mind off things. She grabbed her jacket and left her apartment building.

Once outside, Abby took a deep breath of the cold winter air. It stung her lungs and made it hard to breath, but she welcomed the feeling. She took off on an even paced jog, not really paying any attention to where she was going. At one point, she was so into her jog that she bumped into someone standing on the sidewalk, "Hey! Watch it!"

"Sorry," Abby mumbled under her breath, but continued running, she soon heard the rhythm of footsteps behind her and began to pick up the pace. This was exactly what she needed right now, a stalker, _wonderful, _she thought.

"Abby? Abby wait up!" a familiar voice called breathlessly from behind her. Abby rolled her eyes and slowed down to a walk. This was not what she needed right now. "Geez Abby? What are you trying to do? Run a marathon or something?" Ray Barnett wheezed, placing his hands on his thighs while trying to catch his breath.

"No Ray, it's called exercise. You know, it's good for you? I thought you were supposed to be a doctor." Abby retorted.

"Ha ha, very funny. No seriously though, what are you doing out so late?" the young doctor asked.

"It's only 11:00 o'clock, Ray, I'm not some spinster who stays locked up in her apartment every night. Besides, isn't it passed your bedtime?" Abby turned, and began to jog again in the opposite direction.

Ray came up beside her, "For your information, I had a gig tonight."

"Where? At Chucky Cheese? Don't those kind of things go a little later than 11?" Abby said looking straight ahead.

Ray snorted, "You really think you're something else don't you Lockhart? And for God's sake! Would you slow down?" he wheezed.

Abby slowed to a walk, "What do you want Ray? I'm really not in the mood for this."

Ray grabbed her arm, forcing her to stop, and turned her to face him, "Listen, I heard what happened today; I just wanted to know if you wanted to talk about it. I may not be your favorite doctor, but I know that it helps to talk about it sometimes."

Abby became angry, "How Ray? How would you know this? Have you ever had a case worse than a nosebleed? Have you ever seen the face of a mother when you have to tell her that her child is dead? Have you? You are only concerned with yourself and goddamned reputation as a bad ass! You never finish a case when it gets hard, you always hand it off to someone else. How in God's name would you know anything about this kind of thing? Please! Tell me! I would really like to know!" Ray, just looked at her, eyes wide. "That's what I thought." Abby turned away and began walking back to her apartment. Ray didn't follow her this time, instead he just stood where he was, still shocked by Abby's outburst.

Abby was angry with herself for allowing her emotions to get the best of her. She had trained herself for years not to show that much emotion, but there was just something about Ray Barnett. He always seemed to be able to push her buttons. Once she reached her apartment, all the emotions that she had been feeling throughout the day overwhelmed her. Sadness for the death of a child and the loss of an innocent life, anger towards the driver that took it away from him, and anger at herself for letting her emotions control her the way they did. Moreover, something else that she could not quite put her finger on when she thought about Ray. She went to bed, still in her jogging clothes, too exhausted to bother changing into pajamas.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **I do not own ER, I do not own the characters, basically, I own nothing, so please do not sue! Much obliged!

**We all Cry Sometimes**

_Chapter 2-_

The next morning, Abby arrived at work, feeling ashamed of her emotional outburst. She knew that Ray was working, and she wanted to apologize, he really did not deserve to be treated that way. The hospital lobby was relatively quiet, but it was still early yet, and there was no sign of Dr. Barnett. Abby walked over to grab a chart when someone walked up behind her, "Morning Lockhart." Ray said curtly, while taking a chart.

"Good morning Ray," Abby replied.

There was a tense silence for what seemed like an hour, "Listen, about last night," both doctors began at the same time. Abby smiled despite herself. Ray cleared his throat, "About last night. You were right; I shouldn't have tried to push you like that. You're entitled to your own privacy."

"No Ray, it was my fault. I should not have let my emotions get the best of me like that. I'm sorry." Abby looked at him.

"Well, in that case," Ray smirked.

Abby snapped, frustrated once more, "You know I was just trying to be nice, I thought that I would apologize, assuming that you would be grateful and just, not be you for once," she huffed. She began to walk past him, and he loped to catch up.

"Wait, no, you're right, I'm an ass. Let me make it up to you, take you out for dinner, a drink maybe?" he asked expectantly.

Abby, looked around, "Ray, I don't know if that's such a good," she was cut short by the sound of an ambulance and the paramedics rushing into the emergency room.

"We've got a gunshot wound to the abdomen here! Significant loss of blood!" one of the paramedics shouted as he rushed into the emergency room, wheeling in a gurney. Abby rushed up beside the patient, "My name is Dr. Abby Lockhart, can you tell me your name sir?" she asked the patient.

Ray sighed, "Here we go again," he mumbled under his breath and quickly rushed to Abby's aid.

At the end of her shift, Abby sighed loudly and exited the building, "Long day huh?" Ray asked, coming up beside her.

"Never fails," she relpied.

"So, about that dinner," Ray pried.

Abby turned to face him, "You never give up do you?" she shook her head in disbelief as he stood there, staring at her with that irritating smirk of his. She rolled her eyes again, and continued to walk away.

Ray caught up to her quickly, "Come on Abby, my treat. Besides, you owe me."

"For what?" Abby inquired.

"For being wrong about me copping out on my cases. I actually finished my shift today without handing off one case. I think that deserves some sort of celebration and I'm not going to celebrate by myself." Ray smiled.

Abby sighed once more, "Fine! You win!"

"Excellent!" Ray quickly took the lead and Abby followed reluctantly.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: **I do not own ER, I do not own the characters, basically, I own nothing, so please do not sue! Much obliged!

**We all Cry Sometimes**

_Chapter 3-_

Ray had chosen a quaint little diner for his dinner with Abby; the décor was simple, and was reminiscent of a truck stop. Abby, was a little skeptical at first, but as the dinner progressed, she began to feel herself loosen up a little and actually enjoy herself.

"So then, Mark tells the guy, 'Listen Bud! We are not a cover band!' and punched the guy right in the nose, breaking it. So I of course, went into doctor mode and tried to stop the bleeding, all the while, this big biker guy is crying for his mommy, over a bloody nose." Ray explained, going into full detail about one of the many incidents he and his band mates got into at one of their shows. Abby, laughed, despite herself. Ray certainly knew how to tell a story, even if many of the scenarios he described were questionable.

Ray smirked at her, eyes gleaming, "What?" Abby asked, "What's so funny?"

Ray shrugged, "Oh nothing,"

"No really, tell me." She pried.

"You're actually having a good time, admit it! I have never seen you laugh so much. You know I think that you may actually have a bit of a crush on me, Abby Lockhart." Ray said smugly.

"Excuse me? And what exactly makes you think that?" Abby frowned, just when she thought she might actually be able to tolerate the guy, he had to become his old, cocky self.

"Just a hunch," he smirked.

"God! You are such a tool!" Abby threw a french fry at him. Ray just continued to smile, eyes gleaming.

After the bill was paid, Ray walked Abby to her apartment, chatting animatedly the whole way. Once they reached the doorway, Abby exclaimed, "Well, this is me. Thank you Ray. I actually did have a good time tonight, surprisingly." Ray smiled, and leaned closer to her, lifting her chin up to look at him, and kissing her softly on the lips. Abby did not move away, surprised, she kissed him back. Shocked at what she had just done, Abby gasped and broke away, "What was that for?" she exclaimed breathlessly.

Ray just smirked again, "I was just doing what you were too afraid to do," and with that, he turned and walked away.

Abby just stared, open-mouthed, unable to come up with anything to say. Finally, she turned away from the Ray's disappearing figure and touched her lips softly, they were still tingling from the unexpected kiss, and she smiled to herself as she opened the apartment building door and walked inside.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: **I do not own ER, I do not own the characters, basically, I own nothing, so please do not sue! Much obliged!

**We all Cry Sometimes**

_Chapter 4-_

"You were out late last night," Neela said, as Abby walked into the kitchen the next morning, "Did you have fun?"

Abby blushed, "Huh? Oh yeah, surprisingly."

Neela frowned, "That's all I get? No details whatsoever? Come on Abby, tell me something, anything!" Neela propped her elbows onto the kitchen counter, looking at Abby expectantly, like a little school girl anxiously awaiting to hear the details of her best friend's date.

Abby smiled, grabbed an orange from the fruit basket and simply exclaimed, "Come on, we're going to be late," and grabbed her coat before walking out the door.

Neela followed quickly behind her, "You're no fun," she exclaimed child-like. Abby just kept walking, a permanent smile pasted on her face. The two doctors arrived at the hospital, only to see a full waiting room, the other doctors of the ER were rushing about frantically, trying to see each patient as fast as they could, especially since doctor Lewis had imposed the fifteen minute waiting rule. Still, despite the chaos, Abby was unable to remove the smile from her face.

"You seem different today," Dr. John Carter commented glancing at her from the side. John was one of those people that knew her inside and out.

Abby frowned, "I do?" she said.

Carter smiled, "Yeah, you look happy. It's been a while since I've seen you like this." He replied. Abby stared at him, the feelings she had for him had never completely died when their relationship ended, and she felt bad that her situation appeared to be improving, while Carter was still heartbroken from the death of his child. Yet, she knew that they would never be together, and for the time being, she was content just to be his friend.

Just then, Ray came up behind Abby and rested his hand on the small of Abby's back, she tensed up, "What's going on docs?" he asked.

Carter did not appear to notice Ray's position, or the sudden tenseness of Abby's posture, "Nothing, I was just saying how Abby looked different today," he replied, "Alright, well, I have to go talk to Mrs. Swimmer over there, her son stuffed a brussle sprout up his nose. How he did it is still a mystery," and with that Carter walked off, leaving Abby and Ray by themselves.

Abby swung violently around to face Ray, "What the hell were you thinking! He could have seen something! Of all the immature, childish, irresponisible," Abby hissed.

"Whoa there! I'm sorry, did I do something wrong?" Ray asked bewildered.

Abby pulled him angrily into an empty examination room, "Ray, listen, I had fun last night, I needed it. But just because of one little kiss, it does not mean that we are a couple and that you can just waltz around here showing public displays of affection. And another thing! Just because I went out to dinner with you does not mean that it's going to happen ever again! I was tired, and I needed to unwind, the opportunity presented itself, so I took it. That is it!"

Ray looked at Abby bewildered, "Fine!" and he began to walk away. Right before he reached the door however, he stopped and turned around again, "Did it ever occur to you Abby Lockhart, that you are afraid? You are afraid that you might actually like me, that you actually had a good time and might actually want to do it again. But you're just too absorbed in your own life. You think I'm self absorbed? That I'm immature? Well newsflash Lockhart! I think you need to re-asses this notion of yours!" and with that Ray stormed out of the examination room.

Abby stared at the door, dumbfounded. She slumped down on the cot and placed her face in her hands. She thought that Ray might actually have been right, that she was too concerned with being miserable to even try and be happy. The fact that a young man who barely knew her at all, yet could pin point her exact weakness overwhelmed Abby, and she proceeded to cry, uncontrollably.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: **I do not own ER, I do not own the characters, basically, I own nothing, so please do not sue! Much obliged!

**We all Cry Sometimes**

_Chapter 5-_

The next couple of days were a blur. The ER had been a nightmare, and with Christmas just hanging around the corner, Abby knew that things were only going to get worse. Everyone got sick at Christmas. Ray had been avoiding her all week, which, oddly enough bothered Abby. She missed their constant bickering in a sadistic kind of way. Mostly though, she missed the way that he had made her feel that night at the diner. It had been a long time since she had felt like that.

She kept replaying the entire scene from the examination room in her head. It bothered her that Ray was able to read her so well. It bothered her that he had pinpointed every single one of her weaknesses in one argument. It bothered her that he appeared to know her better than she knew herself. All she wanted was to be happy for once. It had been so long since she had actually been happy.

"Abby, I need you to go help Carter in exam room 4," Dr. Susan Lewis asked. Abby was still staring blankly at her chart, "Abby? Did you hear me?"

"What? Oh yes, exam room 4, got it." Abby blinked and headed for the exam room. She saw Carter working quickly and skillfully on an elderly man, about 62, who had been on duty as a security guard at the shopping centre when a young shoplifter had pulled out a knife and severely injured the man. Along with Dr. Carter, Sam Taggart, Dr. Dubenko, and Ray were in the room. Abby cringed. Before opening the exam room door however, she shook any emotion she was feeling off. She was after all, a professional, and she refused to let something as simple as a minor argument throw her off. She entered the room, put on a lead vest and quickly joined the group of medical workers.

At the end of the day, Abby spotted Ray leaving the building. She was not quite sure what she was going to do, but for some reason, she felt as though she needed to catch up to him, "Ray! Wait up a second," she called out to him. Ray turned around and stopped. Abby caught up to him and stood in front of him, unsure of what she was going to say.

"I don't have all day Abby," Ray said impatiently.

Abby shook her head, Ray sighed and rolled his eyes, he began to walk away, "You were right, Ray." Abby called out to the back of Ray's head. He stopped walking and slowly turned around, "Everything you said the other day. You were completely right. I am afraid. I'm afraid of getting hurt, I'm afraid of actually showing any emotion at all." Ray took a couple steps closer, "We could give it a shot, you know. But you have to be willing to deal with the way I work."

Ray smiled, "And you'll have to deal with my immature, irresponsible, childish behavior."

Abby frowned, "Did I really say that?"

Ray wrapped his arms around Abby, "Every word." And he kissed her lightly on her forehead. "So how bout we head over to my place, I'll cook you dinner."

"You can cook?" Abby smirked.

"Emeril's got nothing on me!" Ray took her hand and the pair began walking to Ray's apartment.


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: **I do not own ER, I do not own the characters, basically, I own nothing, so please do not sue! Much obliged!

**Notes: ** Ok, so apparently, chapter 5 was not posted for very long. I will attempt to repost it with this one. So if you are reading this that is a good sign! Thank you to those who reviewed by the way. It is greatly appreciated and it motivates me to write.

**We all Cry Sometimes**

_Chapter 6-_

The next morning, Abby awoke in her bed smiling. Her dinner with Ray that night had been fantastic. Ray really was a good cook, and he had certainly kept her entertained the entire night. He had invited her to go see one of his show the following night, and Abby accepted, although she was still a little skeptical about it all. From the way Ray described the majority of his shows, they seemed to end in bloodshed and on several occasions, even the ER. Abby seemed to recall a case that was very similar to a patient she had taken several months ago. Yet, she still agreed, hoping that it would prove to Ray that she was willing to give this relationship a shot, if what was happening could be considered a relationship at all.

Abby got into the shower and actually started to sing. A little off key mind you, but none the less, she was singing. Abby became fully aware of this fact and tried to stop, instead, she ended up laughing and singing even louder. When she got out of the shower, she looked at herself in the mirror, she had flushed cheeks and a sweet smile pasted on her face. She felt beautiful. Ray made her feel beautiful. With all the bad relationships that Abby had been in, she had built a wall blocking out all emotion and whenever she looked in the mirror, she felt ugly. The only other person who had made her feel this way had been Carter. Her heart felt heavy at the thought of him. Try as she might to think otherwise, she honestly believed that Carter was her soul mate, and she cherished the memories she had with him. However, all good things came to an end. This much she knew for sure. Carter had obviously moved on, first with Kem, and now it appeared that he had something going on with the social worker, Wendall. It pained her to see Carter with another women, but he had literally broken her heart into a million tiny pieces when they broke up. She knew, however, that it was time to mend those shattered pieces and move on.

Abby chipper mood diminished a little when she thought of Carter, but she was determined not to let it affect her day. She walked into the kitchen, where Neela stood, arms crossed, "Were you singing in the shower Abby?" she asked.

"Was I?" Abby relpied, non-chalantly.

"Yes you were, now would you please tell me what is going on?" she asked expectantly.

Abby smiled at her friend, "Alright, if you must know, I was at Ray's last night. He made me dinner and we just talked. It was nice."

Neela looked at Abby with wide eyes, "You were at Ray's? But you don't even like Ray!" she exclaimed.

Abby just smiled, "He's not a bad guy Neela, he's just difficult to get along with sometimes. He means well, he just comes off a little cocky sometimes."

"And irresponsible, and selfish and," Neela stopped, "I'm just a little shocked that's all. I mean, not that you had a date, just that it was with Ray."

Abby frowned for a minute, "Neela? Do you like Ray?"

"What do you mean by that? Do I like Ray, what kind of question," Neela began.

"I mean, do you like him. Have you ever gotten butterflies, sweaty palms, flushed cheeks, when you were in his presence? Because if that's the case, I won't see him anymore." Abby cut her off.

"No. No, no, of course I don't like him. I mean, I like him, but I don't _like_ him, I mean, that's just ridiculous!" Neela said flustered. Abby raised her eyebrow, questioning her, "No. Abby, I do not like Ray the way you think I like him. Half the time I don't like him as a person either. But if he makes you happy, and it's obvious that he does, I have no problem with you two seeing each other." She replied firmly.

Abby was still skeptical, but she brushed the thought off. She knew things would never really get serious between her and Ray. He was just a kid, and she was a broken woman with a lot of baggage. She knew that Ray would get sick of her and eventually break it off. She knew that that was what would happen in any relationship that she attempted. It was just the way things went for Abby. She was not one to easily let go of her past, try as she might. She thought of all the relationships that had gone sour for her in the past; Richard, Luka, Carter, not to mention all of her high school and college boyfriends. None of them had stuck around very long either. Ray would just be another name to add to the list. In the mean time however, Abby was willing to have a little bit of fun and to let her guard down for a little while at least.


End file.
